life is boring life is free life is sad life is cheerful life is lonely. its all a matter of perspective.

omg i just found a site with the most awesome simpsons quotes!

If you don't like your job, you don't strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That's the American way. - Homer


No,please don't eat me. I have a wife and kids,eat them. - Homer


Homer: I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman.


Homer: Oh, I’m in no condition to drive. Wait a minute. I don’t have to listen to myself. I’m drunk.


Homer: Lisa, vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos.


HOMER (to Lisa): Who the hell are you? The narrator?


Ralph Wiggum: “Hi super nintendo Chalmers.”


Homer: “Ok, brain let’s get things straight. You don’t like me, and i don’t like you, so let’s do this so i can go back to killing you with beer.”


One of my favorite Homer quotes is when he goes to buy a gun and is told there’s a waiting period. He says, “But I’m angry now.”

dont forget when Apu is getting robbed:

*Lights flashing*

“SILENT ALARM ACTIVATED”

actually im just copying and pasting but i cant help it its too funny.

Reverend: We play Bingo,
Homer: Bingo! I love that game but I can’t remember what to say when you win.
Reverend: Bingo?
Homer: Bingo! thats my favorite game but i can’t remember what to say when you win.

Homer – “Shut up boy, your tears aren’t going to bring your dog back. Unless they smell like dog food. So you can sit here eating can after can of dog food until your tears smell enough like dog food, or you can go out and look for him.

Bart – “You’re right!”

Homer – “Damn, I almost had him eating dog food.

Lisa (at powerplant, in cafeteria, by donuts); isn’t there any fruit here?
Homer: This donut has purple in it, purple’s a fruit”


Chief Wiggum: We hereby charge you with the murder of Moe Syzlac and Apu Nahassaa….pema, Apu NaHassa…..just moe, just moe.


Burns: The gazillionaires still laugh at me from their diamond towers.


Homer: (When asked how he tricked Mel Gibson into walking off Mount Rushmore) “He’s Christian; they don’t believe in gravity.”


You are banned from this historical society! You, and your children, and your children’s children …. for 3 months. – Donald Sutherland as curator of Springfield Historical Society.