this looks bad...

sigh... screwed up my own life on October the 17th 2006, will always remeber that lousy Tuesday of my life...

It was tuesday, and as i remembered, it was supposedly the day of my life.. but alas, i screwed it up... the more i think about it, the more im super pissed about myself la... how dumb was i!!! cause i was supposed to go for the u16 trials yesterday which was my greatest dream ever... ok, ONE of my greatest dream ever... always wanted to go into combine school or junior national team... after paper checkign yesterday, went to play lan with chingto and my classmates... then i left liek an estimation of about onehour 15min for the last game... then tmd.. the game drag until so long, then chingto was also late for training and i was late for trials... then somemore we cannot quit cause we are on same team... then after the game we were both rushing to our own venue... then sian diao.. dunno how i actually got so dumb, but chingto ended up persuading me not to go for trials since im already so damn late for it and went for training... and sheesh... regretsregrets... super mistake man, cause one, training was super horrible and two, the trails was postpone due to haze and three, sandratan was told me the consequences of my not-going... sian... she say that i just srewed my chance of ever, EVER getting into the national team... wtf. then i was saying aiya... go also no point, cause also wont get chosen then she said... if u dun believe u can make a diff, then u dun deserve to go... or soemthing like that... wah, also dunno how to react after reading it... then did i start thinking about how i just screwed up my OWN dream because of ONE DOTA GAME!!! sigh... time to reflect on wad i did... must train super hard to make up for my dumbactions now... super super super super hard.

Another bad day. sian, rather go to school than stay at home la... my father is seriously wu ke li yu... i also dunno wad he wants la.. but evverday with him seems to be another confusing day. It was moring after breakfast, then he was going to fetch my grandma home and asked my brother and i whether we want to "pei" (accompany)him to go... then cmon la, it will be boring and he will be sharing more of his da dao li again.. who would say yes... then end up, no oen go. then guess wad... after he come home he started kp-ing already... say wad i zhang da yue lai yue bu xiang hua... translate urself, im lazy... zzz... say i dun accompany him to go anywhere anymore liao then next time dun ask him to accompany me go anywhere... the point is... i actually dun mind, but then if i said yes, then he will start dao-ign me altogether... as if it is even linked... haiz.. dunno wad to say also la... should have just stayed in hostel la... can play soccer everday, can play polo everyday, can go gym evreyday... nicer enviroment. then wen he talks, he likes to keep repeating his sentence every once in a while in the convo... then i was like YA LA, GET UR POINT LA, MOVE ON LA... in my heart.. haha... lame la... then cannot view anything u not happy with against him even though he said he is happy to any comments... cause i can already guess his dumb reaction, he will CONFIRM start daoing whoever complains against him and pay more attention to ppl around instead of that guy... wad to do... bloody no life la.. no accompanying him somewhere is a MUST as long as he asks, not allowed to disagree... or not he will dao u... and i thought fu mu qin de wadever is suppose to be wu tiao jian di fu cu one...

sad post today.. no mood to talk about happy things like tuition cause i really liek my tuiton...




MUST TRAIN SUPER SUPER SUPER HARD
MUST PLAY MORE PIANO
MUST REN (tolerate)...



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